A Little Bit 'O Mothers Wisdom

On this Sunday mornin' fer ya. (In case you were wondering, I affected a Welsh accent for that part but since all my accents come out sounding like an Indian/German mix, I only spelled in a Welsh accent. And since I don't actually know what a Welsh accent is, I REALLY only wrote in an unknown accent, then labeled it as Welsh.) OK with that bit 'o book keeping out of the way, let's move on.

I am on day 3 of a raging, angry infernal bacterial infection. The differences between a viral and bacterial infection are, 1. bacteria generally requires antibiotics and 2. They make me hurt in every conceivable place. Also, if you google bacterial infections you'll learn that they can poison your blood and kill you. If you Google them after you've already googled the side effects of Bactrim (Or whatever antibiotic you've been prescribed) aye yai yai....forget it. You're doomed. Which leads me to Motherly Wisdom Nugget #1: A Little Information can be A Lot of Trouble. I know there's a cliche there but I can't remember it. If a half a percent of people report a flesh eating bacteria reaction from a certain infection, it's going on the side effects. It doesn't mean you're going to get it or even need to know about. But if you read it, the next 5 or ten days are going to be filled with hyper vigilant monitoring. And that, in a nutshell, is me. It's almost guaranteed that if I read a side effect I will have it. Within minutes.

So, I asked my Mom for some help. My mom believes that you get more of what you focus on and what you focus on effects the landscape of your existence. For example, if you look at the glass as half empty, you see lack and emptiness and that colors your world. If, however, you see the glass as half full, then you have something and you are grateful and fulfilled. Over simplified, yes. But Already I can hear the kids waging war upstairs. So, she told me instead of focusing my attention on how many bad things could happen to me, to visualize the Bactrum coming in like stormtroopers and slashing the little green bacteria throats. And to imagine the Bactrum rescuing my poor POW immune system and they get together and fight.

Say what you want. It's day three and I feel the wind turn. I'm stiff and aching from being locked into a fetal position for 36 hours, but I can feel the white army winning. And I didn't spend it scared. At least not all of it. At the very least, I'm not scared of the antibiotics anymore and that's a big thing since I'm pill-phobic. And I think I'm pill phobic because I'm Elvis reincarnated. But that's a story for another day.